In Divorce – there are no winners. Only LOSERS.

Screen Shot 2016-07-05 at 1.14.58 PMTen months of lawyers, letters, texts and threats.

Ten months of dreams, nightmares, grief and reckoning…trying to find a solution to an unsolvable problem….how to divide our estate – what is EQUITABLE? Mediation, cooperation, negotiation, calculation, contemplation, anticipation – culminating in 6 hours of divorce court/trial and tens of thousands in legal fees – AND BOTH OF US LEFT LOSERS.  Except the lawyers.

I promised myself I’d keep it all business, not extraneous or chatty.  My lawyer conversations would be on point, mission driven, efficient – I’d always be prepared and strategic. What a joke.

When Jessica, my lawyer, walked into the courtroom with her legal eagle and intern in tow, wheeling a dolly of boxes labeled ‘discovery’ from the last year of my case – I knew I failed miserably.  I knew those boxes were filled with thousand of pages equaling thousands of dollars – that would never be in my pocket.

When it was over, I thought I’d feel relief – that’s what everyone promised me!  But I didn’t.  I just felt despair, deep loss and more grief.  Divorce is a long marathon, a roller coaster ride – filled with injuries and unexpected turns.  Just when you thought you reached the apex, screamed your lungs out – went to the depth of the coaster at warp speed and lost your breath and perhaps consciousness as a result – you realize the ride is just beginning. There are no 12 steps to this process – or five stages of grief.  There are thousands of steps, turns, dips and leaps – all coming at you without notice.  The journey is unyielding and unmerciful.

All you can do is hold on….and breathe or gasp for air.

Continue reading “In Divorce – there are no winners. Only LOSERS.”

An open letter to the woman who slept with my husband-

You have blood on your hands.  You’re as guilty as he is.  You believed his lies; so you’re a home wrecker and you’re ignorant.

I despise you.  I wish the worse for you.  I hope he shows you the same disrespect and infidelity he showed me – people don’t change. He’ll show you his true colors, like he did me. You’ll get yours. He’s a monster deep down – you’ll see it soon enough.  Just wait.

You don’t know sisterhood.  You don’t honor sisterhood. You don’t belong in any sisterhood.  You should be voted off the island. Any woman who sleeps with another woman’s husband is worse than scum of the earth.  You are like dried dog shit on my shoe – smelly, messy, regretful and need to be flicked off – washed off and flushed down into the eternal sewers of life.  You’re shameless.

Continue reading “An open letter to the woman who slept with my husband-“